Right Wing Limericks

by Al Bienstock

SELECTIVE INDIGNATION

The AP is now making a fuss -
First Amendment thrown under the bus.
Though it's been done before,
This time AP is sore...
We can't believe they're targeting us!

AP, 5/13/13: "The Justice Department secretly obtained two months of telephone records of reporters and editors for The Associated Press in what they news cooperative's top executive called a 'massive and unprecedented intrusion' into how news organizations gather the news."

IRS SCAPEGOAT

The IRS head was canned yesterday
But until June he is going to stay.
Barack's "action" was quick
But it was just a trick -
He was scheduled to leave anyway.

MailOnline, 5/15/13: "President Obama has thrown his acting IRS commissioner overboard, making Steven Miller the highest-ranking political casualty thus far in a series of scandals that have swept his administration in recent weeks...But in an email to IRS employees, Miller claimed he would only be leaving next month because his assignment would be over."

I DON'T KNOW

As a witness, Eric Holder sunk low -
To my deputy these questions should go.
He's the one you should chase,
"I'm... not part of the case."
His most frequent response, "I don't know."

MailOnline, 5/15/13: "U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder today told the House Judiciary Committee he 'knew nothing' about his agency's possession of two months worth of phone records from reporters and editors of the Associated Press... 'I was not the person who was involved in that decision... I am not familiar with the reasons why...'"

SPECIAL COUNSEL FOR BENGHAZI?

A special counsel? Holder says, "no."
Of getting the truth out, he's a foe.
I'll be terse and abrupt -
Eric Holder's corrupt
And it's long past time for him to go..

Breitbart.com, 5/15/13: "Holder is clearly asked, 'Mr. Holder, will you appoint a Special Counsel to investigate Benghazi?' In equally clear tones, Holder answers, "No..."

GREAT RESPONSE

IRS thinks your institution -
Tea Party - promotes revolution.
So they insist they need
To see the books you read.
One group sent them the Constitution.

Breitbart.com, 5/14/13: "[Marion Bower, American Patriots against Government Excess] said [IRS] wanted to know what materials we had discussed at any of our book studies... She said she sent the IRS a paperback copy of the Constitution when the agency asked for books and other reading materials."

RECKLESS UNION THUGGERY

A new union thug ad has a theme -
Everything Corbett does is a "scheme."
The ad's running because
The union bosses' claws
Grab for more dues... then strip off the cream.

Commonwealth Foundation's POLICY Blog, 5/14/13: "The United Food and Commercial Workers Union (UFCW) is spending a million in order to save a million - every year. The UFCW announced a $1 million statewide television ad buy attacking 'reckless' liquor privatization proposals. But the real 'reckless scheme' is the union's shameful attempt to mislead the public to protect its own political and financial largesse."